Goodbye Grandma

Well I woke up this morning, trying to plan my day as always. I had a doctor's appointment scheduled for 3:30pm. So we decided to go to the dollar store. So we ate breakfast, I checked my emails, and then decided to call my grandmom. I call her a few times a week, she is lonely, and from what I have heard from lots of people, she loves when I call. And I get lonely too sometimes being a Stay at home mom. So I try and call here, and she doesn't answer. Now she didn't answer yesterday either. So I decided to call my Aunt Annie and see if my grandmom was over there. No answer there either. So I decided to call my uncle and see if he got Ryan's picture. Which BTW is the reason I was calling my grandmom too. And he sounded weird and asked if he could call me back. Then my dad called. Ok...what is up?? My grandmom had passes away sometime either last night or this morning. My Aunt Annie also couldn't get a hold of her, and decided to go over there, and she found her on the couch. All I could say to my dad was OMG...NO! OMG NO!!! No, I didn't want to believe it was true. Was this a nightmare? I grew up with my grandmom, we were pretty close. I would mail her pictures all the time, and she would send me letters. As I write this, my heart starts to race. Its only been hours since I found out the news. I felt sick all morning, and tried to make some phone calls since my poor mother is a mess. Of course no one was home. And I couldn't reach Tom. Then about an hour later, Tom calls me and says he is on his way home. I need peace. I need time to think, it hasn't hit me yet. Or maybe I just keep trying to block it out of my head. I don't wanna go anywhere, I don't wanna do anything. I just wanna cry. But I have to continue life, for myself and my family. so in an hour I am gonna go to my doctors, then Tom wants to go to the YMCA tonight. I just wanna sleep. I just wish we knew this was coming sooner. I wanna say goodbye, I wanna tell her again I loved her. I just talked to her last week. And she said she wishes she could go to the beach and dip her feet in the water. God, I hope she is doing that now in heaven. And I hope she can hear me. Grandma, I love you and I will miss you so very much. Take Care for now!
LOVE:
Lee-Lee (Thats what she called me)